When coming back to reality is painful

There are several reasons we might feel bad about daydreaming, but a common one is that when we come back to reality we confront the heartbreaking fact that all the wonderful things that just happened in the daydream world aren’t real. That realisation – that real life is less fulfilling than fantasy – is painful.Continue reading “When coming back to reality is painful”

Three ways maladaptive daydreaming makes you feel bad about yourself

Many maladaptive daydreamers don’t like themselves very much, and when you don’t like or respect yourself, you tend to act in ways that reinforce the idea that you’re a bad person. Although I don’t believe that immersive daydreaming is, in itself, a bad thing, I do think that if your daydreaming is more on theContinue reading “Three ways maladaptive daydreaming makes you feel bad about yourself”

Taking responsibility for your daydreaming

You were born a daydreamer. It’s the way your mind works, and that ability you have to create a parallel universe filled with interesting people and experiences is something you will never lose. But if you’re a maladaptive daydreamer, you’re probably very aware of the negative effects that daydreaming can have on your life, andContinue reading “Taking responsibility for your daydreaming”

Why maladaptive daydreamers can struggle with real-life friendships

Many of us retreated into our imaginary worlds because we were lonely. But it can also work the other way. In addition to loneliness triggering maladaptive daydreaming, maladaptive daydreaming can make it more difficult to make and sustain real-life friendships, leading to us becoming isolated and lonely. There are several reasons why maladaptive daydreaming canContinue reading “Why maladaptive daydreamers can struggle with real-life friendships”

Why you shouldn’t be ashamed of your daydreaming

Everyone experiences shame. It’s that little voice in your head that tells you that you aren’t good enough, or that you don’t deserve to be successful, or that nobody loves you. And for a lot of maladaptive daydreamers, it’s the voice that says that daydreaming makes you a bad person or is a sign thatContinue reading “Why you shouldn’t be ashamed of your daydreaming”

Do daydreamers struggle to know who they really are?

This post follows on from an earlier post where I explored how becoming an idealised version of ourselves in our daydreams affects the skills and strengths we bring to our real life. But recently, I’ve also been reflecting on the potential problems of spending too much time being somebody different. Everyone, regardless of their daydreamingContinue reading “Do daydreamers struggle to know who they really are?”

Why daydreamers procrastinate

Procrastination affects everyone to a certain extent, but daydreamers may be particularly prone to it. If you would rather be daydreaming than doing just about anything else, it’s easy to see why you might put off important but unappealing tasks in order to indulge in your habit. But in the long term, procrastination leads toContinue reading “Why daydreamers procrastinate”

Why we find it hard to set real-life goals

A common problem faced by maladaptive daydreamers, and to a certain extent by immersive daydreamers as well, is that we feel we aren’t reaching our full potential in real life. It’s hard to find the motivation to work on the things that are important to us, and we find it hard to sustain our effortsContinue reading “Why we find it hard to set real-life goals”

Are your beliefs about your daydreaming limiting your life?

We all have beliefs about ourselves and the way we act. Some of these beliefs empower us, others hold us back. We can form beliefs at any time, but many of the ones that shape our lives were formed in childhood, when our understanding and experience of the world was very different from what itContinue reading “Are your beliefs about your daydreaming limiting your life?”